They’re gonna make you wear leather sandals and force you to
barbecue tofu
They’ll be closing down all the Taco Bells and cutting off our
Big Gulps
They want to quiet down your pickups and your holy
harley-davidsons
I heard they even mean to make us go to school to get a
license to have a damn kid
They want to stop us from draining and developing these
idle, bug-filled wetlands
They don’t want your kids to pray or recite the pledge of
allegiance at their school
Their godless moral relativism is destroying our Traditional
Family ValuesÔ
and beliefs
Pretty soon you won’t be able to say shit, even when you
have a mouthful
They’re trotting out the same tired social programs that
failed so many times, years ago
They want us all to drive the same kind of unsafe,
uncomfortable, little shoebox cars
They are trying to take away all of our wondrous health care
choices
They think that we should all be eager to recycle trash
without even getting paid
They’ll have us turning down thermostats in sweaters and
shivering in the dark
They preach the virtue of the flip-flop but question the
very word of Jesus Christ
Their meddling with our food supply is going to cost us all
a lot of money
They mean to cut into your freedom with this so-called
healthy lifestyle nonsense
We’ll all be paying out the wazoo cause they’re afraid to
burn a little coal
Beef and pork will be expensive and tough if the bleeding
hearts get their way
They get this recurring dream of socialism they forget was
disproved so long ago
They want your kids to grow up thinking the colonists did
some kind of Holocaust
They’re gonna put a ban on fireworks and take the Christ
child out of Christmas
They want everybody riding bicycles no matter what the
weather
They mean to suck back up to the Frenchies and even start
following their leads
They’re setting timetables for our defeat and letting our
brave boys die in vain
They want to handcuff energy producers and stop us cutting
housing timber
They’re dead set against our jet skis, OHVs, dirt bikes and
snowmobiles
They want us living in gloomy dirt dugouts with unreliable
solar and wind power & no A/C
They’re trampling our property rights with their squishy
concerns over useless species
They’ll have us paying more per pound the more trash we throw
away
They’re planning on national ID cards that they will say are
just to catch illegals
They want to trot out expensive social welfare and shut down
all our prisons
They’ve gone completely overboard on this expensive hoax
called climate change
They’ll put fat, lazy, bitchy women over you with no way to
get rid of them
They want the whole country to look like everybody goes
around in wheelchairs
Pretty soon you’ll need a smog test permit for your grills
and your lawnmowers
They are over-regulating our once-proud auto industry
straight into bankruptcy
They want to cut off all that good cheap Chinese stuff we
buy down to WalMart
They’re out to gut our military and leave us open to the
terrorists with ICBMs
They plan on giving up most of our sacred sovereignty to the
United Nations
They’ll pass out free birth control during your children’s
hands-on sex-ed classes
They want your kids to get real comfortable with the
homosexual lifestyle
They’re handcuffing entrepreneurs with burdensome
environmental regulations
They wish to kill off Christianity and replace it with some
new age pseudoscience
Their moral relativism would have us all believing that
there is no such thing as sin
They’re gonna start to tax and regulate even the places
where we worship
They’ll try to put limits on how many miles we drive in our
pickup trucks per year
They want us to promote based upon race and sex and economic
background
They’re gonna lock up all our federal lands from way back
there in Washington
They’re pushing us all towards some vague, castrated, vegan,
pacifist idealism
They want us to believe that either all the animals have
souls or that we do not
They’re out to stop a guy from driving his big diesel to
work if he wants to
They’ve got this silly notion that our current lifestyle is
somehow unsustainable
They’re soft on defense but love to slaughter precious human
embryos
They question that the marketplace efficiently replaces
foolish social planning
They will handcuff the President on gathering information
for national security
They think that outside developers should not have the right
to local control
They want to cripple the power industry over a few tons of
mercury emissions
They’ll put hybrids into NASCAR and want canoes in the bass
tournaments
They have no respect for the NFL and those big blacks
shimmering in their tights
They’re even against the well-trimmed green lawns that we
fertilize and fumigate
They want to take away your guns but let doctors go murder
more unborn babies
They’re all for letting any Illegals in to take our jobs and
give their kids some welfare
They claim that corporate agricultural entities only care
about their stock prices
They say that raising our packaged meat as cheap as possible
is dirty and immoral
They’re pushing this fuzzy sustainability crap which will
cost us all in jobs and money
They’ll make you exercise and eat raw broccoli convinced it
makes you healthy
They want to teach the bible as literature instead of out
front in biology classes
They’ll have us loading groceries in dirty recycled bags
into weenie little golf carts
They’re putting plants and animals ahead of families and
national security
They want everyone to live like bees in tiny city apartment
hives without any yards
They would legalize marijuana but track and control alcohol
consumption
They even seem to think that being born again has something
to do with recycling
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